Bangkok Bdsm Dominatrix Jaa4u >> Sharing my Dreams
How do you climb a mountain? One step at a time. Life is the mountain and because i start from the poorest family i start at the bottom really. You know how big is that mountain if you start low and everybody is above you already? It’s ok … i don’t have to pass everybody … only i have to stay on the mountain and keep try to go up.
But my son … i want him to pass everybody. He will get to the top. Believe me ok.
I tell him every day … there is never a time in your life where it is the right time to do a great thing. He have to do a great thing every day. See the video end of my story for how i learn that. Help somebody. Be nice to somebody. If he ever see somebody pick on somebody … like happen to me in school before … he will go to stand in front of who is in trouble. Same time he does not have to hurt anybody … fight anybody … say something rude to anybody. Just be so strong he don’t have to.
I never had a chance to finish my school. But until 14yo i was #1 in my class. I was #1 in my school for how hard i study. How hard i try. Every night i do my homework with the rain coming on my head … and only the candle for light … everybody sleep already but i never stop. That … how to fight like that i give to him.
For every time a teacher hurt me … hit me … pull my ear that happen the most … every time i remember that i tell to him he will be amazing. He will be champion. He will have the best heart the most kind heart. He will be smartest in his school … smartest in my country … and same time humble about that. I teach him to be like that.
In my soi for where is my condo … left side has a place to eat … small place but she make a good food there. Anyway … inside she has for her wall a lot of poster for Beckham … Man U people … sport people … famous people … i can understand because my country are crazy for football from England. Not important for me. For me … when i take him there … i tell him … what do you want for your life? Do you want to have a room the same and wish you can be like everybody in the photo? Or you want to work to have the dream … and everybody will put your poster on the wall … because you show them how to be the dream?
And i tell him … you know how hard you have to work to have that dream? Especially because you start from the bottom? You know how many people already think no not possible for you? I know because grade 6 my teacher said to me one thing i never forget … “why don’t you stop?” Not his job to say that you know. But if a teacher will say that … for sure everybody will think that you agree?
So how to change that? How to change everything for him?
One is everybody everyday he sees has to be amazing people. If i put around him only amazing people … i think he have a chance to be amazing too. Not like me … nobody close to me was amazing.
Today he start term 2 for his school … and ya i had help from somebody from my blog. So my story today is for you and you know who i talk about. January. February. March. April. May. June. July … 7 months more he will go up the mountain. How to go from August to December … i have to hope … pray … after that day come i can push him to go up again. But for now ok … i can breathe. I have 7 months to breathe.
What you get for free in your country … is crazy expensive here. Why because … you have to pay for opportunity if you come from poor people … poor country. Funny you know … 12 country in the world i saw already … and what i learn is what country is the richest … like Singapore and Canada … opportunity is free everybody can have it. And where i just come from like Cambodia and what i saw in India … Laos … some place in South Africa … Brazil … opportunity is not free.
Really? That is the world? Everybody is ok with that?
No. My blog says no.
Because my blog is the internet. And why i talk about my life … i know some are too crazy about sex and bdsm story and fantasy … they don’t like me to talk too much about my life. I know i can see that. If i do a sexy story who stays on my blog to read stays for 10 minutes every day. If i do a story like today … 2 minutes only. Google Analytic is amazing teacher you know that?
But probably what i learn the most from my blog from 3 years now … is the internet will change the world … one day. Soon probably. More soon than who has power and control the world now is thinking. Big shock coming for them i guarantee.
How i know is .. me my life. So many bdsm lady have a crazy ‘wish list’ for Amazon … and when i did MyFreeCam website i saw who was top … what they get … everybody buy them everything. MilaMilan remember her i almost work with her and did a lot of story about that 2 years ago? Ya everybody like her got a car … house … ring … clothes … everything.
Why i never worked with her. Why i changed to leave that web show so fast … i don’t want to be fake like that. I tell you how many times and you can see if you go to my Amazon wish list i put only 1 thing … gift card for 1 baht or up to how much somebody want to give me. And i tell you what i buy for him for 3 years now with every money from that? Books for him to read.
English. Thai. Little bit Mandarin and now start French. Only 1 school help him with Chinese but awful school i had to take him out so i stop Mandarin for until i can find a tutor for him for that. My money is crazy low right now so for now cannot but he will.
So you show me somebody from my country who can read like this. See … i don’t need a car … i don’t need a bigger house … i don’t need crazy expensive furniture for inside my house … all my clothes is 100 baht maximum … only if you buy me something then i have something nice … but i never ask for that.
I ask only you help me to help him … and i do it. I never promise you something and never do it. Easy … over 100 books now he read already from Amazon. From his school … amazing international school … about 100 books more. Somebody helped me 2 years ago and again 1 year ago for tutor for math because he know somebody amazing … and i pay for that so he is Singapore smart for math … mean #1 in the world. Had to stop that 
…why because he had to go to Chiang Mai and tutor for that was in Bangkok. It is ok … i will find a way.
How i will find a way … is my blog. Ya ok … i think i am #1 for Tease & Denial and my style is not compare to anybody else style. Of course … if you know me from my life … i have to be #1 always for what i do.
I have 50 email a day.
49 talk about what is amazing for the session coming for him … and how i can help him … and i am happy … very happy to help with that because like i say … you come from around the world to see me you have to know me and trust me so my job is to make you so comfortable to come see me … of course i do my email 3 hours every day.
But what i look for really … is #50. Yesterday … ok this month really … i am trying to tell you and same time not tell you … a lot is broken in my life right now and inside i am crazy sad about a lot of things.
Why the internet is amazing … is i can tell everybody in the world how i feel. When i was small … and life was horrible … 1 million times more horrible than now … who i can tell before the internet? Nobody really … maybe my friend at school … then who i sit beside at the factory for 14 hours … only that many.
So ya … i tell the world my story … my heart … how i feel … and ya same time i say what i can do that is amazing in bdsm. Because maybe only 600 will see the story. If it is not a sexy story … only 100 will read. If it is a long not sexy story like today … maybe only 50 still read this now. From that 50 … 5 will write to me and not ask about how i can tease them … they will write about my heart.
And that … that is the amazing people i can talk to … alone in my life … alone in my condo … i can have a email from somebody i never meet yet and he want to ask me i am ok or not?
So what i try to say … amazing people stay in the world … and the intenet can talk to all the amazing people … if my blog can find them lol.
But more important is my blog … my life … is not about me. Yesterday my son write to me a letter and i think he try to ask me if i will die for him … because i say that to him … i will die for him and die happy because i give all my heart to him. I never leave anything in my life i was sad about because i act fake … or did not try hard for him to make him happy.
200 english books. 200 hours tutor for math. 2000 hours fighting and black belt soon in 3 sport. 4 languages. International school from England. Only possible because sometimes i find a client from my blog to help him go up the mountain.
So for everybody who ask me this week if i will still do jaa4u because of my trouble in my health and my life is a lot for me … yes of course. Because i am #1 for bdsm … but most important is my blog is #1 for helping my son have a chance in the world.
Happy new year to you. My gift for my son for New Year was a Bad Boy hat … and a video i made him watch … because it is the closest i can do to share my dream for him …