Bangkok Bdsm Dominatrix Jaa4u >> Personal Blog … Open Book
In Cambodia i took a photo of this house … why because it stun me … shock me. It is 100% exactly like the house i was born and grow up in Bangkok.
The roof my dad made like that … slope so the water will go off to the side. But they have the concrete i never have that .. my house was on the dirt so the water like i told you before will go inside when the ground is fill with water. When it rains too hard the water comes inside the roof like many drops on your head and you have to live with that no choice. Had to do homework like that with a candle.
Why because you see no electricity right? So life is control by the sun … you get up 5am so washing and everything can be finished already for the sun to dry everything all day.
And night is important you finish everything before 6pm because 7pm is time to sleep … no sun means no light so you have to sleep start about 7am and me i woke up 4am to do laundry and cook.
See the water in the side? Ya we had like that but not so close … everybody had to share the water for laundry and for washing your body. My brother job to carry the water from their to the house many times so everybody can shower … about 14 of us stay in a house the same size like that.
And in front we have the same thing my dad made that to hide from the sun in the day when it is hot.
Biggest problem was the snakes sometimes they come inside or just outside at night you have to be careful when you go to pee. Because cannot pee close to the house it will smell next day in the sun so you have to walk by yourself far to go pee.
Ya to visit Cambodia i see a lot what it was like in my life before.
What is amazing is i can see my house before and my house now and think wow what happened … why my life changed so much?
What can you do if you fight … if you never stay comfortable to be ok with your life and always try to change it to be better.
I forgot to put that in my book … because i talk alot about fighting in my book … but more about everything that happened to me. Honestly … to live like that you are not really so sad because you stay with family and family is everything if you live like that. So because my book is about how to beat sad things by how you can think different about everything … i never stop to think about my house where i lived.
Family can make you happy. That is why this 2 weeks is amazing for me. It is why also last 3 months were so hard for me. No family … or fight too much with everybody in my family.
And actually it is driving me crazy about fighting with my family. You know almost every time i sit to write about what to put in my blog i want to talk about everything in my life … but i know i cannot. Because i want you to know about me … ya of course … so you will come to see me for a session.
But there is a invisible thing you cannot see .. between you and me. Like a shield ok. And i have to keep that so business is business … and life is life i guess so.
I told my friend about almost everything in the first part from my book only … just the first part ok … so not everything he only knows a little bit … and his answer to me about if i should put that style story in my blog too is 100% what i think too …
“M F
Dec 23 (7 days ago)
to me
OMG
First let me say I’m sorry. Every day I feel bad for myself and your story/reality/life 10,000 times harder than mine.
Such a hard story/reality for you……….
I can not imagine how horrible that was for you growing up.
So many horrible things happen to you ………and it is your family and the Thai Culture for the lower class that cause all that……..
Not you…………and then they all blame you for everything……………OMG!!!
Just what I think – Maybe don’t put all this in your blog?? I try to explain what I think…………….
Yes for you your blog is about your life, and about your story, and about how you are feeling right now. I get that.
But it is also the door for your business. If you get too serious/sad/angry in the blog………I think it will really hurt your business.
But then I worry about something else. Because you know a lot about men then you know most men are selfish……..and think they are better than woman right?? Maybe when I was really young I think like that too………so I hope you don’t I think like that now……but I am just sharing what you already know about most men.
So they will read your story………….and some will be sad for you, and some will think your a hero to go through all that………
But most of the selfish men will not think you were a prisoner with those two men They will think you choose that life………that you wanted it……….that you liked it.
Of course that isn’t true………and I’m not trying to make you sad …………… but I am scared they will think that way.
So I think you can lose many clients because they can be scared or wonder if you even like the BDSM at all…………………
Or even worse…………..think like crazy men that they can have you the same way those man did to you……
Maybe I’m wrong but I just don’t think it is a good idea to put it in the blog……….OK………………….
Of course the decision is yours…………..I don’t judge you and I say OK to whatever you decide…………….
Just think this is too personal……….too close…………too painful to share in the blog.”
I do love bdsm. And actually my book is about how everything that happened made me like bdsm even more. And what i think is if all my client make a book about their life … something happened in their life to make their eye .. their brain … open to bdsm world.
If i say bdsm world ok … i don’t mean crazy torture and hitting and pain … i mean everything that the world thinks is not the same … not normal. Something has to happen to make you think not like everybody else. Who knows what that is for you … for me it was … well something not so nice ok. But like i say … you can change everything in your brain … just depend how you want to think about it.
Except family.
How can you make something right that i cannot make right? That is the torture in my life … and now finally somebody understands. Actually i told 2 people … and one stopped writing to me. So half … 50%.
So think you know if … 1000 a day come to read jaa4u … if 500 go away and never come back … ya you can see why some things i have to keep only for a book. If somebody wants to know really bad they can buy it.
Anyway … i just want to show you really where i come from. I cannot go back to Bangkok to show you my old house really because now they put a condo there lol. 20 years ago it was nothing only grass and trees … now it is all road and condos.
So here is the 3 houses in my life … to show you anything is possible really.
